My sister and I had to make decisions that determined the course of my parents’ final hours. This important end-of-life document could have guided us

My parents died three years and two ICU rooms apart. Both were still in their 60s. Neither had a finished will, much less an advance directive – a set of care instructions someone prepares in case they become incapacitated – that could have guided my sister and me. In our early 30s, shell shocked by brutal surprise, we made decisions that determined the course of their final hours.

Today, we trust that we honored their wishes, but doubt and distress linger.